home — part 2


Johnny the monkey boy was soon having a strange dream.

George Clooney was dressed up in his impressive Batman costume.  He was in the monkey boy's room.  George Clooney stood over by the edge of the bed, staring down at him from the shadows.  His cape rustled as he stepped a little bit closer.  Then George Clooney leaned over and whispered down at him, "Hello there, Johnny."  Then he smiled.  His eyes looked at the monkey boy intensely above the smile.  "You weren't expecting to see me, were you?"  Johnny was going to respond, but George Clooney lifted a gloved finger to his lips.  "Shhh," he said.  "Let me do the talking for a while, my good monkey.  Let me share some ridiculously important information with you."  George Clooney stood up straight.  His cape was billowing about in a breeze Johnny couldn't feel.  His eyes looked down at the monkey boy - two lighter points in the shadow.

"Yes.  Lay there and listen.  Take in what I tell you, Mr. Monkey.  Take in my words, and don't let them disturb your slumber and what you understand of this, ah, dream.  Listen to my voice, Johnny.  Listen to my voice. Hear the ideas behind the words.  Feel the truth behind the words.  And when you awaken from your slumber, let your brain forget this:  my being here, the words I say.  However, let the truth remain, revealed, unconvered in your mind.  I will show you the truth which you know on some level to be the absolute truth - a truth you must already ascertain to be absolute.  Now.  Indicate to me that you understood by your thoughts - do not speak.  Do you understand everything that I have said?"

"I understand everything you have said," Johnny thought.  "Um.  More or less."

"Good," George Clooney said.  "Now, continue to pay your full attention to what I am saying."

"You have been thinking about home," George Clooney said.  His expression was unreadable behind the molded mask.  "I tell you, Johnny:  it is not the right thing for you.  You are just beginning to tap into your potential.  You are just beginning to form.  You are poised on the brink of actualization.  You are about to become a butterfly, Johnny.  You are in a state of chrysalis.  You are in the Metamorphosis Zone, my holy friend.  And things can only get better."  George Clooney stared down at Johnny.  The actor slowly slid his lower teeth against his upper teeth.  The eyes behind the mask narrowed.

"I will continue to give your life meaning.  I will make it worth it, Johnny.  You need me, Johnster, and - I'll be frank here - I need you.  I know you think of yourself as powerless in this, but the truth is you have so much power.  So much power.  I am in awe of you - and of those like you.  Simple people in simple worlds.  Consumers.  Blank slates awaiting my signature.  It's cracking the cultural genome, Johnny - an achievement utterly profound to mankind!"  George Clooney laughed a short laugh and then clenched his gloved fist and said, "I fucking am Batman!"

The eyes behind the mask then eased, and the serious line of George Clooney's mouth became a crooked smile as the actor continued on.  "And even as that is fantasy, you - my monkey friend - are infinitely more important than me.  Stay.  Stay here - in your mind, in your soul.  And in body.  I will make it worth it.  I will make it worth it.  Do you want to know what the secret is?  It's simple.  Do - don't review, monkey man!  I offer you a life usually denied those of your consuming brethren!  I offer you a philosophy which usually never occurs to those whose ranks you've departed.  You want to know what that is?"  Johnny nodded to indicate that he did.  George Clooney crossed his arms.  "Not to be the ass planted on the couch of mediocrity," he said sternly.  "You will be the face on the screen - the name in the magazine!  You will be the one who will fill their empty spaces.  You will be the one who inspires hopes and dreams.  The empty spaces in people's very souls.... -it'll be you, Johnny, who fills it up and ignites their dreams.  You will stand fulfilled, and the entire world will know the name 'Monk K.'"

"But," Johnny murmured out loud in a sleepy voice, "my name is not Monk K."  His sound of his own croaky mutter startled the monkey boy, and he woke up.

"Huh?" he said.  The monkey boy felt disoriented.

He looked around his empty room.  Johnny felt quite confused.  "What was I just dreaming?" he wondered.  He had a weird feeling like there was someone in his room.  He wondered for a moment if the angel was going to appear.  "But my head doesn't hurt," he thought.  "And it all feels too weird and still."  There was definitely a weird feeling in the room.  Johnny peered about in the shadows, listening carefully, and feeling a little scared.

Then Johnny heard the TV in the other room.  "Wait!" a tinny TV voice said.  Some blue light flickered in the other room from the TV, making the walls flash in cold blue colours.  "Stay there!"

"Ah," Johnny said.  "It's just the TV."  The monkey boy smiled and laid back down to go back to sleep.  He was asleep again within moments.

And on the TV screen in the other room a man in an impressive cape was flying through the air.  "I'll save you," George Clooney was saying in a tinny whisper that was lost in the night.

"I'm Batman."


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